As we traveled the country doing “home visits” with our top recruits, I woke up early. I prepared to workout, shower, and head to the airport with my assistant basketball coach. We had fifteen more athletes to visit, so we were never in one city very long. I flipped on the television to catch the news.
It was September 11th, 2001 (now referred to as 9/11). I was in Alaska.
The Unthinkable Unfolding
As I watched the replay of the first airplane soaring into Tower 1, I immediately thought I was watching a movie. Then I caught the word “LIVE” on the top left corner of the screen. Stunned, I fell back on the bed and became glued to the news for the next hour.
I flipped through the channels and was mesmerized at what I was watching; the second plane flying into the other tower. Then both towers one after the other falling straight to the ground. I finally realized I hadn’t called my family to make sure they knew I was not currently on an airplane.
A vast majority of college coaches had been in the air for the September annual trek. They were visiting potential student-athletes to fill positions for their upcoming recruiting classes. Having previously lived and worked in New York, all I could think was “My God. All those people. My friends. My colleagues.” I also thought of all the firefighters, police officers, EMTs, doctors, and nurses. These amazing front-line workers who, in times of crisis, focus on one thing; helping others. My heart went out to all of them.
Quickly realizing we weren’t getting out of Alaska anytime soon, my staff and I met at the hotel restaurant to determine our next steps. As we entered and found our table, I immediately felt and witnessed the empathy and compassion of the people around us. People were going out of their way to help one another without knowing each other. Hugs, handholding, opening doors, pulling chairs out for each other, giving up seats for vulnerable patrons, and offering to purchase the food for other people were suddenly happening. Our humanity in full force was a beautiful sight.
As our President spoke about the tragedy on 9/11, he expressed deep compassion and empathy towards those who died, their families, and all those on the front line. “Tonight I ask for your prayers for all those who grieve, for the children whose worlds have been shattered, for all whose sense of safety and security has been threatened…this is a day when all Americans, from every walk of life, unite in our resolve for justice and peace.” [1]
The Lessons of Crisis, a Need for Empathy
Now fast forward to today’s crisis, COVID-19. Though this disruption came with a little more warning, it still took us by surprise. Thousands have died, and millions have contracted the disease. The world is trying to work through the uncertainty of the virus. Similar to 9/11, front-line workers continue to risk their own lives to help other people—empathy and compassion flow. From business owners, neighborhoods, landlords, teachers, coaches, religious leaders, and some young children—everyone volunteers to help in any way they can.
Empathy, as defined in Webster’s dictionary, is “the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another.” [2] Empathetic leaders have the capability of putting themselves in the shoes and situations of other people, with the end-goal of understanding what others are going through.
In her recent Forbes Magazine article, “Do People Feel You Genuinely Care? Why Empathy Is Crucial to Leading Through Crisis”, Margie Warrell reinforces the importance of empathy in times of crisis.
“Honing empathy skills through listening, perspective-taking, and compassion not only leads to better outcomes in the midst of crisis but fosters a ‘culture of courage’ that elevates an organization’s trajectory well into the future. Everyone understands tough decisions must be made in a crisis. When we put the humanity of others at the heart of commercial decisions, it not only helps us make wiser ones, but builds collective trust, loyalty, and engagement that pay dividends beyond the incentive plans and brand campaigns.” [3]
As we witnessed during 9/11, crises generally raise the level of empathy in the world, often coming from the top down. It starts with the federal government and national corporations’ actions and has a domino effect at the state and local levels. However, unlike 9/11, and without trying to sound political, the COVID crisis has not taken the same path concerning empathetic leadership from the top down.
We Must Do Better
It seems that most of the empathetic behaviors during this crisis arose at the local and family levels and on the front lines of the pandemic. Instead of comfort, compassion, and empathy traveling from the highest levels of government to the people, it seems to be the reverse. It’s taking place at the ground level around the world, many times avoiding the higher levels of leadership altogether. Families move to protect the ones they love. Local government officials and business executives attempt to navigate the very confusing national guidelines while making decisions focused on how to keep their citizens safe and simultaneously trying to lessen the economic impact on their communities.
“We’re in this together” always gets uttered from government officials, scientists, and medical experts to media anchors and columnists as we work through this crisis. But our words must match our actions. So, as this new crisis and perhaps the new normal settles in, empathy must remain a landmark for our decision-making.
We are in a pandemic and need continued empathetic leadership at all levels. We need compassion for those who are struggling. Whether in grief over human loss, or financial constraints due to the economic hardships, empathy doesn’t necessitate a top-down approach. Empathetic leadership does not demand permission; it commands the heart. It can be ignited from anywhere and from anyone. Empathy remains as essential today as it was in the past, and as it will be in the future.
If we’re in this together, then let’s shatter the walls that divide us and work on it collectively as opposed to separately.
Sources:
- George W. Bush’s Oval Office speech on 9/11 – NBC archives
- Webster’s dictionary definition of empathy
- “Do People Feel You Genuinely Care? Why Empathy Is Crucial to Leading Through Crisis” – Forbes Online Magazine – April 13th, 2020 by Margie Warrell (Contributor)
